Which Purim Character are You?
March 10, 2020
By Liad Machmali, Torah Editor
It’s that time of the year again, when all Jews finally get to wear the discounted costumes they purchased back in November and reminisce in the fabulous story of Purim. This March 9 and 10, we will follow along as we read the drama-filled story of how the Persians knew what it really meant to party from day 1. There are beauty pageants, women growing tails, 40-day feasts and so much more!
And what better way to get fully immersed in the tale than to figure out which character you resemble the most. Take this quiz to determine which Purim character you are! Are you more like Vashti or Esther, Mordechai or Achashverosh, or maybe even… Haman?
Answer these questions to find out. And Happy Purim!
Question No. 1. Your friend has an incredible talent that they are unaware of, do you:
- Sit down with them to discuss their beautiful neshama
- Ignore it because… who cares
- Give them time to acknowledge it on their own
- Intentionally not tell them so they do not outshine you
- What gift are we talking about??
- Kill them
Question No. 2. A teacher gives you a bad grade on an essay you think was perfect, do you:
- Politely ask to meet with them to discuss your grade
- Spread rumors about the teacher
- Take their feedback and work harder next time
- Talk to the school principal
- Do fun things to block out the emotions you are feeling
- Plot your revenge
Question No. 3. A friend you dislike stands up to say something at Town Hall, you are most likely to:
- Politely clap and put your grudge aside
- Comment on how short their skirt is
- Silently sit and listen to their opinion
- Prepare a counter-argument
- You were too busy eating to notice
- Kill them
Question No. 4. Someone makes a joke about you in front of your crush, do you:
- Laugh it off
- Say a rude joke about them back
- Forgive them and understand that they did not have negative intentions
- Gossip about them to your friend
- Have your friends stand up for you and lose trust in that person forever
- Plot your revenge
Question No. 5. Your uncle sits down to discuss politics at the Shabbat dinner table, do you:
- Refrain from stating your opinion so things don’t get too heated
- Roll your eyes
- Have a civil argument
- Leave the table to talk to your cousin
- Gulp down the remaining wine from the Kiddush cup
- Kill them
If you answered mostly As, you are like Mordechai: You’re the Chacham at the Pesach seder, always enriching the lives of others with a good dvar torah and the glow of a Daf Yomi learned right! We honestly don’t even know that much about you because lashon hara just ain’t your thing.
If you answered mostly Bs, you are like Vashti: Vashti? More like, “Vash-Treat Yo’ Self!” Although you are not always the most sensitive person towards others, you sure as heck know how to value yourself. Often viewed as a controversial person, you are either loved or hated, with no real in-between, but let’s be real, some of the best people are. By the way, if you happen to be dealing with some of that adult acne — as some of our favorite commentaries say Vashti did — apparently Curology does the trick.
If you chose mostly Cs, you are like Esther: You are a QUEEN. Being fun-loving and caring are just two of your greatest attributes. Some may even consider you to be the “mom” of the friend group as you will do anything for your loved ones — even if that means entering a contest to marry an arrogant king or fasting for days to save the extended-family tree.
If you answered mostly Ds, you are like Bigthan and Teresh: You’re the friend group that didn’t branch out freshman year. You know each other really well and are a match made in heaven, but one huge fight might just be the end, and all those around you are waiting for it. So just remember, be true to yourselves, and maybe stop whispering so loudly in the corner.
If you chose mostly Es, you are like Achashverosh: You are the definition of an extrovert. Forty-day feast with all of Persia? Yes PUH-LEASE! You love to be loved and will almost always do anything to please others. You are the life of the party, but once the party’s over your true feelings start streaming in.
You depend on others for almost everything and it is not always easy for you to recognize the toxic people in your life, but once you do, it’s time for everyone to watch out. Be careful as you may focus too much on self-indulgence and power, leading you into a downward spiral.
If you chose mostly Fs, you are like Haman: Why you gotta be so rude? You
seem to be concerned only with yourself and although there may be more beneath your surface, no one seems to have the courage to find your positive attributes. Our suggestion: yoga, meditation, and a couple of mitzvot.