Becoming nocturnal
April 2, 2021
Ever since March 13, 2020, I have not been able to go to sleep before 1 a.m. I am not really sure why, but it is the truth. Spending a majority of my time inside has completely changed my concept of time.
It’s not like I spent all my time outside before the pandemic, but I had different places I would be at different times of the day — school during the day, home at night and long car rides to and from the Valley in between.
Now that there is no transition from the school day to my home time, my ability to separate the two has been ruined. I see no difference in doing school-day work and doing homework. Online school has messed me up so much that sometimes at the most random times of night, I will worry that I missed a Zoom meeting.
However, since March 13, 2020, I also have seen more sunrises than I ever thought I would, and I have gotten more comfortable with being in my own skin. Being awake at 4 in the morning really provided some time for me to just listen to my thoughts without the chaos of my house making it impossible to hear myself think or getting texts every five minutes.
When I tell people that I have become basically nocturnal, they usually think I am joking. But I am not. Going to sleep long after everyone else has provided me with time to be okay doing absolutely nothing.
When I thought in the past about living through historical events, a pandemic definitely was not what I was referring to. But I have grown in ways that I do not think would have been possible if I had to maintain a normal circadian rhythm in a normal year.